*Trigger warning – Grief
Saying goodbye to a beloved familiar is so difficult, and it can feel like the grief is all-consuming.
Here’s a little ritual that I found useful when I said goodbye to my soul-mate, Cairo. I hope it can help some of you 🤍 Of course, as with all rituals you should feel free to make it your own and adapt it in any way that suits you.
The first part of this ritual is very difficult, but going through it will help you to feel, and process some of the emotions you are no doubt trying to avoid feeling.
Find a peaceful space where you can be alone with your thoughts and emotions.
Light candles and incense, and play music that soothes you. Make this space as relaxing and comfortable as possible. Keep a drink of water or herbal tea nearby.
Now write a letter to your familiar. Tell them what they mean to you, tell them everything you love about them, and of your desire to stay connected spiritually, and (if it aligns with your personal beliefs) that you look forward to seeing them again.
Even writing this has me crying – because I’ve been through this, and I know how hard this is – but these thoughts and emotions do need to be processed.
Choose a crystal or crystals that feel right to you. I chose garnet and rose quartz. Sit with them and pour your loving energy into them.
Take rose petals to represent your unending love.
Take a hair from your head – this represents that a part of you goes with them.
Now, the next part depends on whether you are having a burial, have ashes to scatter or keep in an urn, or are doing this ritual long after, and no longer have either – so there are various ways to finish the ritual.
Place the letter, crystals, petals and hair in the urn with love.
Ashes to scatter:
Burn the letter and hair and turn it to ashes, scatter it with ashes of your familiar and leave the crystals at that same place.
Bury the items with your familiar with love.
Take all of these items and bury them in honour of your familiar – or if you prefer, keep them in a memory box alongside photographs of your loved one.
Sending you all my love and blessings and healing energy,
*This ritual can also be adapted to working through grief following the loss of a loved one – Deb has written it with a pet/familiar in mind as that was her recent experience, but please use this in any way that feels right.
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